Eventually you will smile more than you have cried; eventually your tests turn into testimonies, and soon you will see that it all made sense in the end. Until the revelations and the end, you, however, find yourself depressed and distressed, some of the least favorable feelings in Christendom, because, as I heard during the roughest times of my life, Christians cannot be depressed nor anxious.
And this isn't even going to be one of my stereotypical posts laced with memes and a slight undertone of comedy. No, this is me addressing the chapters before the redemption. I wholeheartedly believe that certain patterns, challenges, phases, and catastrophes must end. It is simply crazy to think otherwise. I refuse to be burdened by the stings of life day in and day out, to allow my mind and my body to dictate how I view life or how I react to it.
Truthfully we were all made different for different purposes, and that means even that our battles will look different. At times it makes little to no difference complaining about the storm in the midst of the storm, telling your friends, your family your brethren even—and yes, of course, upliftment and offered prayers can be key. But for myself, every time I share an experience I am going through, the reactions and the reception are a bit dull, stilted, or not fully comprehended. I am not saying I need my entire circle to dramatize life with me. I am simply saying they don't understand the drama well enough to even rationalize it, and so I have learnt to seclude myself and ask for the strength to endure.
I remember recently being on the edge of a breakdown—yup, not a breakthrough—and I had to look to God; then I had to really look at myself and ask myself why I was allowing the stings of life to cast me down for so long, allowing my tests and my battles to bruise me so much. You see, as long as there is life, there will be issues, but I have learned that as humans, we even create some of these issues, myself included. So yes, irrespective of the natural cause or the consequences of our actions. How can we then allow ourselves to become burdened to the point of no return?
Over the past months, I have been hurt by others, I have been betrayed, I have been isolated, I have had to adjust in unfavorable environments. I have had to reject crying as an everyday activity due to feeling overwhelmed continually and last I have had to speak life into myself and say enough is enough! As harsh as it may have sounded as I sat there and heard how un-Christlike our lack of mental wellness is, I had to speak to myself and pray to God for him to remove the elements, the factors in my life, and most especially to learn contentment so I would become less reactive to the circumstances of my life.
Sure, I believe that life hits so badly at times; depression does come, but I also know I would never want depression to reign; I would never want each time they mention 'mental well-being' I am triggered. I also agree that Christendom can be insensitive when people don't spill their struggles out loud; you need to know why someone is regularly unkempt, why someone is constantly quiet, why someone is absent—you need the why before you offer consideration, as we have become insensitive to the aura emitted from others.
We speak of spiritual eyes, and we speak of connections so one-dimensional. I would think a heightened sense of spirituality would allow us to observe and then make amends, not speculate out loud. So many of us are consumed by displaying our feelings and opinions out publicly and saying, "I got a word".
Regardless of who has gotten a word, as it's undeniable- God works mysteriously. We owe it to God to make amends and to ask him to mend us. As the roughest chapter closes, we have to see the light even when you have not fully descended from the darkest cave. We have to start smiling even though tears have been our meals for nights. Forgiveness, making peace with our past, adjusting to the future, and strengthening our walk with God are just a few of the keys we need to unlock the redemption story after being stuck in conflict chapters. Ultimately though it all starts with him and ends with HIM so as broken and lost as your are, find your Father and be redeemed.
Scripture References
And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.
1 Peter vs 10 ESV
For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith. Mark 11:23 KJV
My tears have been my food day and night, while people say to me all day long,
“Where is your God?” Psalms 42;3 NIV
Now when these things begin to take place, straighten up and raise your heads, because your redemption is drawing near. Luke 21;28 ESV
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